You're Not Getting Old Card

Age is just a number… but the number of fucks left to give? Yeah, that’s rapidly approaching zero.

Perfect for anyone embracing their inner chaos with each passing year — or just too tired to care anymore.

• A6 size (10.5 x 14.8 cm) – compact enough to carry your last remaining care

• Printed on premium matte card, unlike your patience

• Comes with a standard envelope, not a midlife crisis

• Inside reads: Happy Birthday